Inferiority Gremlins

Here they are, back for another fun-filled day of making you feel like shit: it’s the

Inferiority Gremlins!

Starting to feel like you’re making progress on that novel? Thinking it might actually come together into something coherent? Wondering if you have the tiniest little shot at eventual publication? Let the Inferiority Gremlins help wipe those nasty glimmers of hope from your mind to clear it for the soul-crushing doubt and despair that fuel your creative process!

Just when you thought you’d nailed a chapter, our patented Inferiority Gremlins will gleefully show you just how labored your style actually is. They’ll collect a wide variety of examples of other up-and-coming writers who have landed better opportunities through story publications, awards, conferences, and other skill- and résumé-building experiences. Never fear—your delusions of adequacy are not long for this world with the Inferiority Gremlins on the job!

Haven’t had enough professional rejection yet? No worries—Inferiority Gremlins have a plethora of passed-over grants, submissions, and query letters to throw in your face*! For the extra-special touch, every one is stamped in bright red ink with one of our signature replies, including Rejected, Denied, Nope, Loser!, You jokin’, bro?, As if! and more!

What’s that you say? You haven’t even made it to the submission and query stage? Well, then, Inferiority Gremlins have something just for you! In these cases, our little experts will bestow our secret, crippling combination of lethargy, ennui, and confusion. Lack of experience and apprehension can keep you from starting the submission process, but if you fear you’re about to begin, Inferiority Gremlins are here ensure you never do.

Don’t let any positive emotions endanger your writerly persona! Get your own Inferiority Gremlins today!

*Papercuts available for a small additional fee.

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